This Nostalgic Life Issue #11
'70s Television Favorites
Here is your latest nostalgia-laced edition of This Nostalgic Life. In this issue, we’ve got classic television memories, outdoor toys, music highlights of the 80s and 90s, and some great Recommended Reading links for you to check out. Enjoy!
By Eric Vardeman
When I was a kid, TV was a huge deal in my house, as it was in a lot of houses at the time. I’m talking late 70’s, early 80’s (which would put me in the 8-11 age range). My daytime viewing was hit and miss because if my mom caught me inside watching TV for too long on a nice day I was promptly told to go outside and play. The evenings, however, were a different story. My parents parked themselves in the living room every night. For the most part, they had sole control over what we watched and, trust me, I watched a lot of stuff that was WAY above my age range. Every once in a while, though, I got to watch something I wanted to watch. I have vague recollections of several shows that have lived in my brain for 40 years now. You know what I’m talking about, right? Very unspecific but specific memories of things from your childhood or youth. I remember watching certain shows but have fleeting memories of the content of those shows save a specific memory or two from each of them. Here are three shows that fit that description for me and the very specific memories I have for each.
That’s Incredible (Monday nights) - This was one of television's first reality shows. It was hosted by John Davidson, a post-NFL Fran Tarkenton, and Cathy Lee Crosby. Mom and dad liked this show, too, so we watched it on a regular basis. It featured people with unusual talents (they once featured a 5 yo who could hit a golf ball extremely well…turned out that was Tiger Woods as a child), stunts (I remember a guy walking on hot coals), as well as scientific, medical, and technological breakthroughs. It also featured reenactments of paranormal events which all scared the living hell out of me every single time. At the time, we lived in a semi-haunted house (that’s an entirely different story) so I was terrified that all of their haunting reenactments were soon to be happening in my own house. My one lasting memory from this show: they featured a segment on something called “spontaneous human combustion”. From that point on, I was terrified that I was just going to burst into flame and end my beautiful little life before it ever got started.
Donny & Marie (Friday nights) - Perhaps the cheesiest show ever created. This was on before my parents' shows started on Friday nights so I was able to watch it. It, of course, featured the dancing and singing talents of the twins, Donny and Marie Osmond, as well as other actors and comedians - mostly of the “B” list level - in skits and spoofs. Strangely enough, this show was originally created by Sid & Marty Krofft (they’re a whole article by themselves) and produced in Los Angeles but, after a long battle, control was given to the Osmonds and production was moved to Orem, Utah. The Utah location was said to be the reason only “B” list Hollywood stars were willing to appear on the show. Perhaps the most recognizable part of the show was a segment called “I’m a little bit country, I’m a little bit rock and roll”, where the twins would sing a song by the same name intercut with a medley of songs - Marie singing segments of country songs and Donny singing segments of “rock” songs. My one lasting memory from this show? A recurring skit called “Captain Purple” where Donny was a Superman type character named D. Clarke Osmond who, when needed, could change into Captain Purple by simply saying the word “Elprup” (yes, that’s the word purple backwards). Usually, Marie played a damsel in distress that was rarely saved by the bumbling Captain Purple so almost every one of these skits ended with her yelling “help” in the same manner every time.
Kids Are People Too (Sunday mornings) - This show was on early on Sunday mornings. Me watching it kept me out of my parents' hair while they got ready for church so the let me watch. By the time I was tuning in, it was hosted by a guy named Michael Young. Now, I have very clear memories of the host opening the show singing a song called “Kids Are People Too” (the lyrics “wakadoo wakadoo wakadoo” from that song will forever be stuck in my head). The previous host, Bob McAllister, apparently sang that song at the end of the show and his version of that song can easily be found on YouTube. But I not only distinctly remember the host singing it to OPEN the show but I remember him playing fetch with a dog all over the stage while he sang. He even had special “tennis ball holsters” on his belt where he kept the tennis balls before the dog joined him on stage. Sadly, I can’t find a single shred of evidence of this on the internet so it must be another instance of the Mandela Effect. Such a pity. The show itself was aimed at teens and featured a lot of teen actors and singers. I remember seeing stars from the shows “Diff’rent Strokes” and “The Facts of Life” to Shawn Cassidy as well as Leather Tuscadero herself, Suzi Quatro. The one episode that ended my viewing of the show for good, however, happened in 1980 when KISS (still in full makeup and garb) was featured on the show. In fact, they debuted their new drummer, Eric Carr (replacing the departed Peter Criss) on said episode. My mother walked in, saw them - incredulous that I was watching such people on Sunday morning before church - and turned it off. I wasn’t allowed to watch anymore. Thanks, KISS.
As I researched for this article, I realized just how many shows from my childhood fit into the category of “vaguely specific memories and recollections”. I’ll be featuring some of those in the coming weeks. Stay tuned!
By Eric Vardeman
We’ve got two songs peaking out on their respective charts this week.
In 1984: It’s the last week on the chart for Duran Duran’s “The Reflex” which peaked at #1 a couple of weeks ago. It’s the bands first #1 song and the third and final single from their massively successful album, “Seven & The Ragged Tiger”. They won’t have another #1 song until next summer when their James Bond theme “A View To A Kill” takes the top spot.
In 1990: Mariah Carey moves into the top spot with her very first #1 song, “Vision of Love”. It’s the first #1 song in a string of nineteen that she’ll have over the course of her career. The song wins her the 1991 Grammy for “Best Female Pop Vocal Performance”.
Playlist: This Week In 1984
Playlist: This Week In 1990
The Green Machine
Not to slight the Big Wheel, because really…how can you, but skid-outs on the Wheel were nothing like the ones you could pull off on the Green Machine. Slightly bigger and slightly meaner, the Green Machine was what you cruised around on when you graduated from Big Wheeling and were looking for your next three-wheel adventure. It was the next generation of ride-on kid vehicles. Instead of front wheel, handlebar steering, this bad boy had two shifting handles on either side, connected by metal rods to a pivoting rear axle. Pull one all the way back and slam the other one forward, and you had yourself one gravel-spitting, cacophony-inducing, grade-A skid-out. Climb aboard—the asphalt is just ready and waiting to make friends with those molded plastic tires.
Marx Toys released their lime-green tricycular vehicle in 1975. Because it was tacitly understood that the Green Machine had a bit more testosterone to it, and a bit more wipe-out potential, the clever marketing campaign encouraged parents to talk to their male children, to be good role models and to establish a firm value system. Apparently, the idea was that the time your son spent Green Machining around the driveway, practicing his skid donuts and 180’s, was the perfect window for a parent to stand around nearby and espouse the virtue of telling the truth and always being respectful of your elders. They thought our silence was quiet absorption of their life lessons, but really, we were just seeing if we could do ten perfect donuts in a row. Everything outside of that glorious wheels-on-concrete din was white noise, but no one needs to know about that.
And please don’t think that the boy-specific ad campaign and the Machine’s masculine color scheme meant little girls never took this low-rider for a spin. What do you think they were doing all that time you were holed up in your room with your new He-Man action figures?
In 1993, Empire Industries bought the Green Machine rights from Marx, and named it the Big Wheel Sidewinder. There was also a Green Machine variant called the Blue Max. But come on, the green was where it was at. It’s the color, after all, that represents money, envy, growth, and the perfect skid-out.
In every edition of This Nostalgic Life, we like to share a curated list of nostalgia-themed articles, stories, and posts that we’ve come across recently. It gives you a chance to discover great content and remember things from your past that you may have forgotten. With that in mind, here are some things we wanted to share with you this week. (All links will open in a new tab.)
15 Best Video Game Commercials of the 1980s (Den of Geek)
Sunday Night Television When I Was Growing Up (Shroud of Thoughts)
The Summer of 1997’s Tamagotchi Toy Craze (YesterYear Retro)
16 Valuable ‘80s Collectibles Hiding in Your Home (Wealth of Geeks)
How the Compact Disc Changed Everything in the World of Music (Ultimate Guitar)
The Power of Love…and Rock-and-Roll (Nostalgia Nation)
Thanks for reading this issue of This Nostalgic Life. Drop a comment below if any of this has struck a chord with you this week. And you can always reach out directly to Eric and/or Mick on X to connect personally. Eric can be found at @eric_vardeman and Mick is always available at @yesterdayville.
Didn’t know most of these, woah! So neat. 📺❤️